![]() ![]() You make comparisons to real or imagined alternative partners. ![]() You view your partner and your relationship in a negative way.You’ve stopped bringing up issues altogether.When you bring up issues, your partner shuts you down.You have the same argument over and over.You may be in relationship limbo-hell if: It feels like taking two steps forward and tens steps back. Once you enter, it can feel a lot like Groundhog Day: you wake up every day with the same dynamics and have the same conversations repeatedly with the same results. How we enter relationship limbo hellĮntering relationship limbo-hell doesn’t happen overnight. But to understand how to exit relationship limbo-hell, we must first understand how we enter it. In fact, at NCCT, we’ve helped more than 1,000 couples get unstuck and move forward with clarity, even if it means ending the relationship. The good news is that relationship limbo-hell isn’t a permanent state. We turn away and turn against each other’s bids for emotional connection to avoid our own vulnerability, and in turn, erode trust and undermine our ability to connect and repair. When we’re in relationship limbo-hell, our behaviors become self-perpetuating. Unable to go backward or forwards, we get caught in what NCCT Founder and Director Kerry Lusignan calls “relationship limbo-hell.” We know something has to change, but simultaneously we can’t go back to the way things were. In the same way, we can get stuck in our relationships when we’re afraid of getting hurt. The engine revs, and the wheels spin, but the car doesn’t move. Imagine a car wedged up on a curb with its tires elevated off the ground, unable to get traction to move in either direction. ![]()
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